Friday, August 31, 2007

A letter from Tradgardland

Dear Gottfried Graf von Schirnhausen

We are delighted to receive your most esteemed letter. May I suggest that Ulrika Von Smegby . chief Lady in Waiting to the Duchess, will be more than happy to make the necessary introductions and act as chaperon whilst in the Duchy. I trust this will be amenable to all concerned.We await your reply with great interest.

With kindest regards

The secretary of the Ducal Society

Chronological Notices

In attempting to reconcile the schedules of the ducal household, Chancellor von Schirnhausen has gathered to himself several resources from the astronomical almanac prepared by Monsignor de Chiaroscuro and Technical Counselor von Traun, but is perplexed by certain difficulties of politicial interpretation of the Monsignor's data:

The phases and eclipses of the moon for the century Msgr. de Chiaroscuro provided here, and the Gregorian and Julian calendars for the year, here and here, respectively.

We note, for instance, that the Prinzessin Sophie-Vittoria's debut at Schloß Moritzburg occurred on the Feast of the Assumption, normally August 15, as it was this year--a Monday--along with the debut.

Counselor von Traun, as another instance departed for Tradgardland on August 4, sailing down the Rhein the next two days, and traveling by fluyt from Rotterdam to Copenhagen the next two days, meeting the Duke of Cornwall's flotilla as they passed through the Oresund on the 9th. After three days at sea, the flotilla reached the Shetlands, discharging Counselor von Traun, just before being wrecked in a storm the same night.

Monsignor de Chiaroscuro departed Hunsruck on July 30 on his journey to the Banat in execution of his papal commission, completing the difficult overland travel on Aug. 13, entering the Togarastadt on the 14th--Sunday, and spending the following night and day as an involuntary guest of the late Abbot of St. George, before departing the city on the 15th, just prior to the Austrian entry into the city on the 16th.

Taking all of this into account, one can see the importance of reconciling the dates and required travel times to properly organise the affairs of His Grace. However, while it is well known, for instance, that Britannia switched to from the Julian to Gregorian calendar five years ago, among the very last of the great powers to do so, it is also a fact that the Tsarina of the Russias has not yet embraced the calendar.

In order to reconcile the correspondence and embassies of the ducal court, as well as to prevent any misunderstandings in the scheduling of the international debuts of the Prinzessin, now underway, Chancellor von Schirnhausen requests the hypothetical courts of Europe to relate for his reference the calendrical system to which they subscribe. A chronology of other courts' movement from the Julian to the Gregorian calendars is attached above for reference (click for larger view). Further, it would be of great assistance to the Chancellor if correspondence to His Grace were dated with both the date of sending as well as the date of any expected reply, to aid the Chancellor in prioritising correspondence for His Grace's attention.

Grateful for any and all assistance the other courts are able to provide in this matter, we remain your humble servants,
Graf Gottfried von Schirnhausen
Chancellor to Duke Ignaz von Pfalz-Kognat-Obersayn

Oversea colonies: one step further

Worried to discover, with the existence of Ny Tradgarland, how incomplete was his knowledge of the New Continent, Prince-President Louys asked the Monte-Cristan Academy of Sciences for an analysis of the current political situation there. A provisional summarized report (with a short addendum about the situation in South Africa) has been posted on the official Monte-Cristan board.

Could the man in red uniform be a Ny Tradgarlander militiaman?

Thursday, August 30, 2007

A letter...

To His Grace Herzog Ignaz

Sir I am instructed to remind your Grace of the forthcoming meeting of Natural Philosophers on Holy Cross Day and ask if he intends sending representation. I am respectfully asked also to extend an invitation to yourself to join the Duke in the days proceeding for entertainments and discussions of a diverse nature. The invitation extends to your family also.It is hoped that the occasion may heal misunderstandings on the part of all parties in the past.Finally I am also instructed to ask you if the Duke's daughter Alisona has availed herself of your hospitality in recent days?
yours most humbly

The secretary of the Inner Council

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Dispatch from V. Ballpark

Baron V. Ballpark at Schonau
Gen. Chevert at Gemunden.


Pursuant to your orders, my dispositions were thus:

A squadron of dragoons each at Grafendorf, Diebach, and Hammelburg.
The Grafendorf position covered the direct route from Salzungen and Fulda; Dielbach a route which could be used to flank our right;, and Hammelburg on the excellent road leading to Wursburg which actually passes about four miles east of Gemundenm and to which a good road from Gemunden leads.

I had posted Oberst Chicken at Wolfmunster, Lieutant Oberst Sanders at Ascheroth, and the 1st Hottatrot battalion back at Schonau. This last as they have a reputation for impetuosity and thus I could count on their advancing quickly to the point of contact. Most of the Cavalry was also at Wolfmunster. The Gallian infantry was also posted at Wolfmunster.
As the enemy approached via Neuwirthshaus, Wartmannsroth, and Waizenbach, the squadrons at Diebach and Hammelburg were withdrawn to Aschenroth and Weyersfeld.

When the enemy arrived at the bridges and defile at Wolfmunster, two days ago, they discovered that all of the open terrain between the ridges on both sides of the river were under our 12 pdrs posted on the east ridge. They decided not to contest that defile but ascended the ridge at Schonderfeld, the next day, flanking our batteries.. As the position at Aschenroth seemed to offer the foe too many manuever options with his superior forces, we have concentrated on the plateau at Seifriedsburg, The enemy appears to be deploying directly against us, but I have ordered the squadron at Weyersfeld to remain there as an outpost should they attempt another flank march, as this would put them on the Wursburg route again and thus evade our position entirely.
Our left flank is covered by the defile between Schonau and Wolfsmunster. This is barricaded and covered by some light guns and dragoons ... and the hillside is mined to cause blocking landslides should the foe attempt to force it.
We are trying to create a series of delaying positions across this plateau. Even though we are only about six miles from Gemunden, the nature of the terrain is such that should we fail here, there are several other defiles on the route, which winds more than ten miles from our position to yours.

Yr Srvnt,
V. Ballpark

New Tradgardland

This painting ( which hangs in the Ducal Palace ) is a fair and honest representation of New Tradgardland. It is a small colony which consists of a simple town , a few surrounding fields and a beach with a sandy landing area.It is situated around a day or so march from the great Gallian fort of Louisberg- with whom cordial relations are maintained. A Priest from the fort will say Mass for the New Tradgardlanders in the absence of a Priest from within their own community.
The Local Tribe live in peace with the town and cordial and mutually beneficial relations are maintained.
Ships from the Duchy call regularly with supplies to supplement that which is grown ,fished for or bartered for. A militia is in evidence for defence purposes only , comprising local volunteers.

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

New Tradgardland

The inhabitants of the Colony of New Tradgardland,situated between the French and British areas of influence in northern America ,are concerned . Circumstances will soon force them to take sides. They wonder if other small colonies feel as they do- isolated and afraid yet filled with excitement at the possibilities of this new land. The men discuss such matters as they take a well earned break from their daily tasks near the shoreline. The politics of Europa talk loudly even here!

Monday, August 27, 2007

Karl Frederick...

The High Sommer has come to an end in the Duchy of Tradgardland.The Duke muses upon another busy day.The Ducal Society expedition has returned with myriad pelts but no definite answer re the Tradgardian Boar and met with him this morning. After a meal with the Inner Council Karl Frederick peruses some plans left for him by Incability Braun concerning a new grotto and accompanying hermit .In passing the Duke notes that Alisona is absent once more but turns once more to the matter in hand.
After a brisk,yet frustrating game of tennis ( losing to ones Duchess is bad form ) Karl Frederick retires to his private rooms to plan for Holy Cross Day- where to accommodate the guests, will the Archbishop behave ,what to say as welcome and who will come?
Two hours fly by and then Karl Frederick turns his attention to papers from New Tradgardland ,far far away across the Ocean, where there are rumours of wars and sundry worries.He reads of the lack of food alleviated by the generosity of the Arcadian Savages and how all must side with either Gallia or Brittania.It is all too vexing!
Yet more hours pass prior to a light supper taken at his desk and then a welcome falling into the arms of Morpheus.

A 7th Continent discovered?

The Gallian Court is feverishly buzzing with rumours. A Navy Capitain would have ‘secretly’ reported to the King the discovery of an immense new Continent somewhere in the Pacific Ocean. Could it be fabled Mu or half-forgotten Lemuria?

Victory at Polkfurt

Early reports indicate that the noble forces of the Principality of Saxe-Bearstein, although outnumbered by the troops of the Duchy of the North, managed to defeat that Duchy's attempt to bring desperately needed supplies to their forces in Polkfurt.

The Northerners had previously captured the Saxe-Bearstein city in a foul and perfidious manner. Therefor it is only just that they will now have to surrender. Exact terms of the surrender are being negotiated even as you read this.

Details of the battle will undoubtedly soon become available through the auspices of the Duchy of Mieczyslaw, who had both reporters and some artists overlooking the conflict.

(I'm too tired to write much tonight . . . but the most noted unit of the conflict is the Edelbrau Dragoons. They not only received Battle Honors (as did the Karlsberg Jagers), but they are now lauded as Elite troops instead of just being Veterans.)

The Edelbrau Dragoons are the unit in red coats. The image shows some of the transport that they've destroyed as they prepare to continue attacking the Norden supply column. Other units were also involved (but not nearly as prominently).

-- Jeff of Saxe-Bearstein

Saturday, August 25, 2007

Dinner with the Select Society

The Friday evening with the membership of the Select Society was for Herr von Traun a truly novel experience. Seated in a room of the Masonic Lodge above the Laigh Council House without regard to precedence, the members of the society embraced a wide variety of callings within the life of Edinburgh--faculty members at both the University of Edinburgh and of Glasgow, solicitors, artists, architects, Kirksmen and landlord squires from the countryside all gathered about, juggling a dizzying variety of conversations about the room with wit and aplomb, avoiding only topics "such as regard revealed religion, or which may give occasion to vent any principles of Jacobitism."

The topic of the main debate was "What are the most proper measures for a gentleman to promote industry on his own estate?" The meeting was presided over by a Professor of Moral Philosophy at Glasgow, who moderated debate with a thick Scots accent and a bit of stutter.

Herr von Traun's English was poor enough to render much of the evening's Scots-salted proceedings unintelligible to him, especially the discourses of the Glaswegian Dr. Cullen seated next to him, but he was received with great courtesy and interest by the assembled members of the club, and was asked to speak on the state of natural philosophy in the Rhineland. Herr von Traun offered a brief summary of his correspondence with the Turinese Conte di Menusiglio, to whom he had been introduced by the ducal Tutor, and with whom he had been in dialogue the last year on the nature of the combustion of gunpowder. The assembled society received the conclusion of his remarks with polite applause, and Herr von Traun was invited by a Mr. Ferguson, a former chaplain of the Black Watch, lately the Librarian at the Advocates Library, but recently made tutor to the Household of the Earl of Bute, to the nearby tavern at which it was customary for the more academic members of the society to retire after the meetings for supper, a wee dram and a further discussion of phlogiston theory.

Warps of Religion

As Jeff pointed out, the "Wars of Religion" were technically over in our period.
But ...
Fred the Grape in our period played "the Protestant Card" in order to isolate Vienna and France ... and to sustain his support from England and northern, Protestant German districts. Apparently, this ploy worked well.
The historical (as opposed to our hysterical) Frankfurt raised three companies for the Reichs Armee. They were supposedly well tricked out (in all the meanings of "trick" I'm afraid) but quit en masse when they discovered that they were really going to have to take the field ... while a FreiKorps battalion was raised there for Prussia.
Given that my Frankszonia is deliberately a schizophrenic mish mash (just ask the Intendant Bastille!), this seemed to be a good fragment to toss into the brew!
As we Later in the Day Saints, say, "I'll drink to that!"

Friday, August 24, 2007

An Invitation accepted

I have great pleasure in accepting the invitation open to all men of a philosophical nature to the Duchy of Tradgardland on Holy Cross Day. I do not intend to offer a paper on this occasion but may speak informally of my work with precious metals. I will be accompanied by my man servant only.
Yours in Concord
Frederick Karl Egner

Eddies and Rapids in Formal Costume

Eddies and Rapids in Formal Costume

Scene 1: the Gallian Flood

The original schedule for Sunday’s fete had been as follows:

Noon: Inspections of Infant, Mother, and Hurtshog by Court Physicians
2 PM: Processional March to Cathedral
3 PM: High Mass, Blessing of Banners,
4 PM: Recessional March to Palace
5 PM: Another grand feast ... which must include many, many ceremonial toasts ....

Now, these events will occur as scheduled, but obviously much, much more is going to happen this Sunday!

After the uprising of the Frankfurter Constables, who attempted to storm the new Bastille, and the assassination of the strange Englishman at the Masquerade, the town is in turmoil in the morning. All that is known is that the town council and constables, whose Protestant and Germanian sympathies are well known, reacted violently to Bastille’s attempt to seize and to imprison their leaders under a Gallian style “carte blanche”. In the morning, every burgomeister and constable still alive (and not attending the Masquerade the previous night) is either in prison or in flight through the sodden country side.

Even as the crowds start to gather in spite of the efforts by the dragoons to keep them dispersed, a loud drumming fills the air! A huge force of Gallian troops pours through the city gates and, led by picked troops of loyal Frankszonians, quickly clears the streets and occupies key points and the great bridge. The few civilians who are brave or foolhardy enough to try to talk with these troops find that not only are these forces not defeated (as rumors still insist happened), but have struck and scattered the infiltrated corps of Hamburgers in Russell Wald!

Sunday’s schedule will enjoy much smaller civilian celebration. The crowds are replaced by long lines of alert Gallian bayonets!

Scene 2: Rocks in the River

Earlier in the morning, the tired and harried General Bastille received l’Comte Beauphaup and * Herr Eberhard Kunegunde: Master of the Frankszonian Secret Police. While Kunegunde looked more worn and tattered than Bastille, Beauphaup was his normal, impeccably attired and pomandered self (to keep things simple and short, it’s been a bad night after all, I’m going to keep to bald narrative today). After assuring the Intendant that the Hurtshog understands Bastille’s motives for his actions and sympathizes, the nature of the events force him to take a public stand which is less friendly than his personal feelings.

They deliver a stiff note of protest from the Frankszonian Court concerning the Gallian security sweep. Not only does the Hurtshog view this as a serious violation of Frankszonian autonomy, but also, Beauphaup tells Bastille, the swift removal of the ladies removed the only sure way of investigating the murder at the Masquerade. It is obvious that the Lady Pettygree could have, at least, identified the victim and given them an idea as to his purposes. Kunegunde also reminds the Intendant, that as a personal confidant of the Hurtshog, his forces could have been utilized more safely and without arousing the latent pro-Germanian attitude of the merchants and craftsmen. Furthermore, the Gallian preemptive action within the city has meant that the real resistance leaders in the countryside and many of their forces are now either fled or in strongholds, whose reduction may not be worth the effort they would require.

Furthermore, Fettucine, the Italian dancing master whom the victim apparently knew, has taken refuge with Count Saucie, the Ambassador from Bologna. General Woad, on whose Black Skirts suspicion has inevitably fallen, has mustered his regiment and barricaded himself in an Estate beyond the walls. The Hurtshog understands that Broderick Woad had been at the Masquerade, but had rushed to his troops even as the victim was dying in the hall. Woad himself, is not Scots, but clearly knows something. However, the Jacobite emigre and his officers insist that they will only cooperate if “a certified representative of the Gallian Monarch” is present and participates in any investigation.

Beauphaup also personally advises General Bastille that he should order Rosenschnauz and Hottatrot to rejoin their troops post haste. While the quality and loyalty of both men and their troops is proven, Beauphaup feels that they would be better employed in the field. Unfortunately, since they are also old friends of the Hurtshog, Fahrtz has balked at making them resume their duties away from court, using their wounds as an excuse to keep their company. Both men, however, had shown vigor and quickness at the masquerade in their own ways, however, and Beauphaup believes that with the Gallian forces currently in Frankfurter, their presence is really unnecessary.

Kunegunde also requests that the Gallian troops continue their rigid security in the streets until their own constabulary can be rebuilt. Both men assure Bastille that Gallian participation in the day’s schedule of formal events is desired, but if Bastille wishes to remain away personally, this supposed rift might lure other disaffected elements into revealing themselves.

As the visitors leave, Bastille ponders their messages. He also holds a note from Phillipe: “The rebel Rosemary was at the masquerade and was at Beauphaup’s house this morning.” Given the count’s, ah, proclivities, a romantic attachment seems unlikely. Bastille wonders what plot the slimy intriguer is generating now.

Scene 3: Into the Maelstrom

As the Ladies Pettygree and Masquerade canter through the early morning mists with their martial escort, wagons are suddenly pushed into the road to block it! Phaulies Fusiliers form up behind the wagons, bayonets levelled, while Hussars dash from concealment to surround the troop!

Even as Lt. Gardier’s troopers lower their lances to break out of the trap, General Phaulie gallops up shouting at his troops to hold their fire! He dashes up to the Gallians with apologies on his lips when he is startled to see the ladies. “My Ladies!” he says, “what madness is this? We’ve been skirmishing with Hamburger and rebel remnants along the highway all night! You all are riding right through a battle!”

“It’s not the first time for them,” Lt. Gardier retorts. Then at Phaulie’s insistence, gives him a brief account of the night’s events.

Gen. Phaulie then requests a private word with Lady Pettygree. When he is assured that the lovely woman has the Hurtshog’s private communications for Charade, he declares that the safety of the ladies is more important than rounding up fugitives. He, himself, takes two squadrons of Hussars to act as outriders for the Gallians and escorts them at speed to the bridge at Nidda, parting from them at sunrise. Even so, as they ride rapidly through the muddy lanes, the Gallians note the signs of recent troubles, a few burning barns, cottages with their windows shot out and doors smashed, an inn heavily damaged by cannon balls, an unfortunate herd of cows mistaken for cavalry in the darkness, and similar scenes meet them ... though parties of peasants under control of soldiers are already working to gather the few human bodies from the places where darkness had hid them.

Gen. Phaulie tells the ladies that religious tensions in the area are contributing to the troubles. The Anglericans tend to be more receptive of Protestant alliances than the Later in the Day crowd, he assures them ... and they have the adherence of many tradesmen and country nobles, while the peasants and the Court tend to be much more in favor of the Catholic powers.

“There’ll be a drinking dirge tonight,” he tells them sadly, and explains that it is a formal toasting which must be done with inferior libations as a penance.

August 24, 2007 (12:18pm)

Thursday, August 23, 2007

An Invitation to Natural Philosophical Societies in Europa

The Ducal Society of Tradgardland invites Natural Philosophers and some such Societies to a grand meeting of inquiry to be held upon Holy Cross Day ( 14th September for our separated brethren) in the Ducal Palace , to be followed by a banquet and entertainment. Guests will be provided with accommodation and will leave with a hastily printed and bound copy of the lectures given the following day.

All interested parties should send their names , Society credentials and subject of their discourse ( if and only if they wish to speak to the gathering ) to the Secretary of the Ducal Society, Tradgardland by 1st September in order that arrangements may be most carefully made. after which details will be sent to the participants as to the events of the day!

Going to the dogs?

Hmm, comparing notes Le Comte de Buffoon and Pfrank Bach realize they have each received a fine pair of obviously well-bred hunting dogs.
Each gift is delivered with a note on very fine vellum. Each is in an obviously feminine hand saying . . ."Mon Cheri, as soon as I am able, I will be with you. For now, accept these fine animals as a symbol of the passion which you once showed to me. I will soon be able to requite it.-- Your Devout and Ardent Lady".
Le Comte assures his loving wife of many years and mother of his 12 children that he has no idea who this woman of mystery is. Le Contessa is merely amused and teases him about his lady love.
Bach, for his part wonders which of numerous former loves could this gift be from; could it be Queen Cleopatricia Mary Margaret Hooligan of Little Sheba and the Nubile Empire, or maybe the ravishing Mme. de Haute-Maintenance of Gallia; possibly, but not likely, the highwire and trapeze artist and contortionist Angelique; even less likely, the exotic Rani of Nookie; possibly Col. S. Gumby of Britannica's 11th daughter November Gumby or the delight of Bordelleaux Mme. Betty Noir?
On the other hand, the same gift of a pair of dogs and a note in the same feminine hand was sent to le Comte?
Le Comte is not overly concerned and soon has the hounds traipsing after him through the Batrachian marshes, but Bach with his keen instinct for survival decides it is time to call on his old friend and distinguished man of science the astronomer Sir Giovanni Schlepperelli. Schleperlli is one of those men of widespread and inquisitive mind these days who loves a good mystery and a chance for investigation and logical reasoning.

Krankenstadt Palace, The Grand Duchy of Stollen -- 23 August 1767

News Release:

This morning, the Grand Duke Irwin-Amadeus II was awoken by his English valet, “Hives”, with the news that a mysterious “gift” awaited him in the garden of Krankenstadt palace. Although it was passed 10 o’clock, the Grand Duke mumbled something into his pillow about the impossibly early hours of his job and that “Grizelda”, the notoriously foul-tempered palace laundress, had over-starched the grand ducal long johns yet again.

Down in the palace garden, wearing his silk dressing gown (navy blue with little red-orange lobsters covering it), Irwin-Amadeus II was at once set upon by two friendly hunting dogs, belonging to the ancient Spanish Water Dog breed. The two bounded toward him and then proceeded to cover the Grand Duke’s hands and face with wet, slobbery kisses!

Needless to say, Irwin-Amadeus was extremely pleased -- especially when informed that the dogs were a gift. Overcome with joy and surprise, the Grand Duke at once named his new friends "Max and Moritz".

In the hours since, there has been considerable speculation by those close to the Grand Duke about these "gifts". The dogs were discovered mid-morning, tied to a hitching post outside a side-entrance to Krankenstadt Palace. Apparently, there was no clue left, explaining from whom, or whence, the dogs came, only a sealed envelope attached to the collar worn by Moritz. The letter contained therein was written by an obviously female hand and reads simply, “From a lobster lover.”

Thrown into a nervous tizzy of speculation, Stollenian ministers have sequestered themselves in a government building close by Krankenstadt Palace, to discuss this latest development. Who exactly has presented Max and Moritz to the Grand Duke Irwin-Amadeus II? And what are her intentions? From which apocryphal 18th century country might the mysterious young lady -- already dubbed "Fraulein von Y" by palace insiders -- hail? Saxe-Bearstein? The beleaugured Town of Tippelbruder? The Principality Hesse-Engelburg? Or the Kingdom of Leder-Hosen?

Might Max and Moritz instead have been a gift from someone in the Electorate of Vulgaria? Or perhaps the vile Kingdom of Stagonia? The specific identity of Fraulein von Y notwithstanding, what are the possible implications in store for the Grand Duchy of Stollen and its ruler? Only time will tell. As further developments come to light, you can read about them in Der Krankenstadt Tageblat!

-- Katrina Bettina von Heffelfinger

An Invitation ot all Europa

These Austrian Secretaries invite all ambassadors to present their credentials to the new Austrian Governor in the Banat of Togaras where they will be welcomed and feted well!

For further details of the new regime and Governor see the Banat Blog now!

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

The Ducal Society - a day later

The Duke enters and joins his fellows in perusing the plans ( see above) lying upon the table. There is great excitement coupled with relief - the salvaged steam propulsion vessel is not beyond repair and there are possibilities of making it faster. The Duke's mind drifts off and alights upon the fact that his daughter Alisona is away from the Palace often theses days.

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

The Grand Masquerade

First of all, where is a link to all those lovely 18th and 17th century pictures you all are finding ... it would have been marvelous to have had a few of those for this entry!

In spite of the wind and rain, the grand processions are conducted with suitable pomp and circumstance, though the drum and brass section occasionally seemed out of key and off beat during the lightning and cloudbursts. Armored against the wet by plentiful potions, the people of Frankfurt party. There are, alas, a few regrettable incidents between the German and Gallian participants in the street which bring quick reactions from the dragoons posted at every corner. Arrests of disorderly house parties are also reported, the dark wagons of the constabulary rolling through the streets accompanied by the jeers and thrown empties of reeling revelers to the new jail.

A major break with tradition, however, is that the military, outside of their formal functions and patrol duties, seem to be absent from town ... and a frisson of rumor of great battles nearby runs through the crowds.

Some of the major Foreign notables who are specifically honored with carriages and escorts and participation in the rituals include the following:

Saxe Bearstein:
Consular military attaches, Major Karl von Lager:
who of course will be feted by various ladies, invited to the Council of Knights and other ceremonial functions. In private, the Hurtshog and Gen. Meyer will be interviewing him about a coordinated response to Stagonian irritations. What they are looking for, of course, is acquiescence to the Frankszonian “protection” of Offenbach. He will also be offered a run down farm for the construction of a Saxe-Bearstein consulate near of the city. Le Comte d’Beauphaup assures him that Frankszonia would rather throw a barbecue than a battle!
. For the masquerade, he will be costumed as a fairy knight. He is promised a “noble lady of high estate, breeding, and appearance” for the Masquerade. In the meantime, however, there seems to be a strong likelihood that he will make the acquaintance of Martha, Lady Pettygree’s maid. Who, of course, will be at the Masquerade as one of the many fairy girls in attendance.

Generalmajor Paul von Scheider and wife Roswitha von Scheider are also in the glittering train of nobles and officers at these events. Again, In private, the Hurtshog and Gen. Meyer will be interviewing him about a coordinated response to Stagonian irritations. What they are looking for, of course, is acquiescence to the Frankszonian “protection” of Offenbach. On the other hand, Frankszonia is concerned to preserve the unique nature of the Soweiter League, especially as they provide handy entre-pots to regional markets often under the thumb of more grasping, larger powers.
They are to be costumed as members of Oberon’s (and who IS Oberon?) court.
Helga Freitag, Under-Secretary for Minor Matters on Even Numbered Months, will, of course be closeted with Stuftliana and Professor DuBois discussing ideas for educational establishments (as in military academies). Rumor has it that they will be costumed as the other set of “Lovers in the Forest.”

Fraulein Francine Oppenkopf,

if she attends as a Stagonian representative, will be granted a constant bodyguard / protector due to the current tensions vis a vie Stagonia. She is told that Frankszonia simply can’t tolerate interference with the Soweiter League due to vital economic interests. (On the other hand, she’s been offered a deal by some disaffected Frankszonian merchants at terms which, in their words, they would be cutting their own throats).
At the dance, she may be torn between a person with a commanding air who is costumed as the Ducal General of Cuirassiers (Lord Bastille, in half armor and in command of security) and the heroic figure of the Marquis d’Hottatrot, dripping with gaudy medals and enjoying his moment of glory .... playing up his wound for all it’s worth (nor is he adverse to groping groupies).

Lady Rosenschnauz will be playing a fairy godmother near the alcove where the Urpprinz will be nursed and nestled. What as or who with her husband will attend is not known. Rumor has it that he will be unable to participate due to his wound.

Those who know him might recognize Phillipe, either as a waiter with a tray of drinks or dancing with a young girl of the local nobility. The lass is dark haired, animated, and roguish in her behavior, as well as being a good dancer. Alas, she seems deaf to all the various importunes of dubious opportunities with various officers and burgomeisters which will be offered to her.

Sir Tom, the count Saucie: the tall, dark envoy from Duke Alfredo of Bologna ... middle aged but in good shape, having established himself as a decent cavalry officer prior to this appointment, will arrive escorting another of the local debutantes, but will also make a pass at Fraulein Oppenkopf ....

The squire Charade, who is part of Pettygree’s and Masquerade’s entourage, attends as the human slave swiped by Titania from Oberon (and, oh yes, who gets to play Titania?). His costume of decorated ballet leotards displays his youthful and athletic figure much to the distraction of several of the local frauleins.

Naughty gossip has it that the poor Comte l’Beauphaup, having been rebuffed by Lord Charade and by a French officer is not attending. On the other hand, his skill with costume and disquise is legendary. Will anybody spot him before the unmasking?

Prior to the entrance of the Hurtshog and his wife (separately as “the Lovers in the Woods”), the crowd is entertained by the hilarious high jinks of Puck and a rotund fellow wearing the Donkey’s Head.
While this offsets the tension in the crowd caused by rumors of battles approaching Frankfurt, the tension is revived when people notice that the ceremonial guards are not standing to their normal rigid, formal poise, but are instead at arms - ready, and obviously scanning the crowd, the various rooms, and the grounds with martial intensity. There are also rumors of some little outbreaks by mechanics against the Gallian laborers who had, of course, also been included in the festivities.

Meanwhile, Fettucine is happily pairing off with young and old of either sex alike to lead them through a few figures for each new number that Moosart’s musicians bounce through. Tumblers, acrobats, mimes, jugglers, and other entertainers wander through the crowd performing their stunts whenever they hit an open spot. There are even folk dancers and actors imported from a region famous for their arts.

All goes well with the chattering, gay, and glittering company swirling and jumping and bowing through polkas and minuets and waltzes (with a few going off to enjoy some waltzes of the Straws). The colorful costumes above the polished marble floors amid the mirrored walls and sparkling chandeliers make a dizzying whirlpool of color. All of this turbulence of color is framed by the deep, polished wood and plush, velvet drapery (a few which drapes seem occasionally agitated from behind by pairs of brightly polished or beaded shoes).

After midnight, the crowd gathers onto the balconies and into the paved courts (it’s been raining most of the day, after all) to enjoy the fireworks against the dark clouds. The firewheels, sprinkling lights, multi-colored boms and lofty rockets dazzle against their sable backdrop. After a grand finale with Moosart’s most bombastic piece accompnied by fountains of light, flights of rockets, and spreading blasts of golden showers high in the air, everyone bestows their dancing partners and other suitable targets with grand, flourishing, romantic kisses. Oh, embarrassed laughter as the unmasking shows who kissed whom!

Then the frivolity is suddenly shattered by a loud roar! “Hold up there, ye conniving Italian bastard! I’ll carve yooor tripes tae haggis! Ye’ll cozen me lasses nae mair!” There is a sudden flash and clatter of swords rippling in a wave of screams and shouts. As some soldiers push through the crush towards the disturbance, others take quick steps away from the people and cock their pieces alertly ... One reveler tumbles bleeding into the mirrored hall holding a shattered rapier while another breaks through the bewildered guests and vaults a stone wall into the night.

As the officers converge on the wounded man, who sinks into (and promptly ruins) and elaborately embroidered seat, the young stranger looks up and says in clear English (for those who understand that uncouth and disordered tongue), “Fettucine! Ah well, old chap. You know, I was sure you were the one supposed to assassinate me. Pettygree! and that old laird as a lover!” He grimaces for a moment, then asks, “What will poor Georgie say?” As the court physicians try to clear away his finery to reveal a horrible slash through his rib cage, he gives a wry smile, winches, and in best Hollywood tradition, dies.

Among the confused and clamoring guests, the Intendant Bastille finds that the Hurtshog is suddenly standing beside him with a drawn sword and pistol, watching the crowd as if he was the Intendant’s body guard. Then, even before Bastille can frame an appropriate comment or question, another sudden alarm descends on the estate. With loud shouts of challenge and response, a troop of both Frankszonian dragoons and Gallian Hussars gallop into the estate. Their officers fling themselves from their horses and smash through the crowd to the Intendant. One has no hat but a bloody bandage, and another’s arm had been shot.

As the Intendant and his own officers draw their own weapons, the Hurtshog barks, “Vell?!”

The Frankszonian dragoon replies, “You and Moose Hunter were right.”
The Gallian captain interjects, “He committed suicide.”
The Frankszonian agrees, and adds, “Some got away anyway, and they’ve got a few of their damned martyrs now.”

“Pferde Schizen! Bauergraben Mucken! VerDamnt!” roars the Hurtshog. Then he spins on the Intendant angrily. As the Gallians prepare to shoot the Hurtshog down, he tells Bastille, “Ach! Now vill you some Frankszonian marks earn, Mein Herr! Ve were ov dem dumbkopf Stadt Constabulary suspicious. Und! Ve var Ricthig! Diesen Baurenfoofs macht on Sein Bastille an attack. Alle ist aber, nicht kaput. Vir haben diesen Furhren gerumpt, und alle die arsenalen secured.” The Hurtshog gets control of himself, and continues, “it seems that a few of our prisoners did escape anyway. After all, the constables were all veterans. But now, Ich mussen eine Reich von Armee declare ... which makes you, m’Lord, my ranking und most responsible minister as General der Ober Kommander.”

General Schwann steps up to the Intendant and salutes. “General, he asks, “may we secure these nobles here until your command have declared the city safe?”
A lieutenant of the Sage Guards marches up, salutes: “The Princess and the Urpprinz are safe, M’lord. The Rosenschnauzes have put squares about them and the great ladies.”
Two other officers (note, one Gallian and one Frankszonian) ride in from the city. They clomp up to the Intendant, “we are in luck, General. The mob did not riot, thanks to all the rain; and once the constables started shooting, everybody actually fled to their homes. Except for the troopers doing the house to house searches, All seems quiet .”

Stay tuned.
Who was Oberon and Titania?
What happened to Puck and to the donkey?
How will this batter the poor Paranoid Bastille?
Who was the Englishman, and why did he die?
Will the Ducal family and the Noble Ladies be rushed to Gallian safety, or will Frankszonia now be secure, even enough for Bastille?
Meanwhile, how have the Frankszonian Battalions under General Chevert fared?

We wonders, aye, we wonders.

August 20, 2007 (12:06am)

Points of Order Or Definition

Points of Order Or Definition {Something Like That?!}
Courtesian = A woman of the "oldest profession in the world" serving wealthy clients or those of rank.
Courtier = An attendant at a sovereign's court. One who seeks favors....
Decolletage = low womanly neckware.
For those who may care or need to know, Lady Diana Pettygree (the Jacobite emigré from Isle de Pettygree in the Britannian Channel) and her particular friend Lady Cherish Masquerade (who really IS Gallian) are neither courtesians nor courtiers though the latter is closer to the mark, or so it seems. I ask the reader to grant me forbearance in this since there is more to them than is apparent to the casual interest. Also neither of the two ladies would be convicted of amorous liasons and would be outraged at such accusations and impertinence, etc. They also have declined to adopt the decolletage designs so prevalent in decadent Germania or Gallia for that matter. Both are protected by, well, that's a state secret.
With prodigious apologies for anything considered presumptious above. Tis the storyline you see that I want to maintain.

The Ducal Society of Tradgardland

The Men of the Ducal Society meet this evening with their sons watching .This evening they are treated to a demonstration of the new orrery built by one of their number. They meet in the hope that they can herald in a Golden Age for the Duchy. Duke Karl Frederick has sent his apologies to the meeting but hopes to gather with them soon. He anticipates the advances that will make the Duchy the envy of Europa.

Hesse-Engelburg Troops arrive in Freistadt Tippelbruder

Word is spreading through the populace that a rider has arrived at the Palace to announce the arrival of the Hesse-Engelburg contribution to Tippelbruder's defense as of this previous Sunday, the 19th of August. An encampment has reportedly been set up on the windward side of town, on a commanding hill, and scouts from the Hussars and Jaegers were combing the woods for Stagonian agents.

Monday, August 20, 2007

Rally round for Soweiter!

From the Frankszonian Stadt Council:
To: The Sovereign Autonmies of Eruopa and the Empire ...

Given the increasing friction between the Soweiter League and Stagonia appears about to ignate a conflagration of serious proportions, the Hurtshog v. Frankszonia has been grinding his brains looking for a better recipe to assist Soweiter.
One ingredient appears to be vital. Given the scattered nature of the league and the small measure of the involved territories, it might be best if the better seasoned powers granted a quick passage to the Soweiter units, which seem to be mostly company sized servings of mixed ingredients.

Further, permitting these units to train and to maneuver with our own forces would perhaps garnish both their and our links to a more potent flavor.
In the interim, the Frankfurter Bundt would be interested in bidding on any surplus production by the TippleBruder Tailors ....

l'Comte d' Beauphaup
on Behalf of His Highness Stanken, the Hurtshog Fahrtz v. Frankszonia ...

From a Banat of Torgoras Broadsheet...

Following the recent rioting of the Banat populous and sundry chaos a new chapter has began. The Austrian Troops entered the Banat capital yesterday , secured the City for the Empress and executed a number of the leaders of the rioting including the Abbot of St George. A shocked crowd witnessed his demise and returned meekly to home ,occupation and station in life.
It is hoped that this has marked an end to recent unhappy times and a Golden Age will flourish under her Imperial Majesty. An interim Governor has been sent to the Banat and will arrive tomorrow
No further word has been heard regarding the former Voivde or this whereabouts. We are assured of his safety and his reconciliation with Church and State.It is hoped that Holy Orders will bring him joy and concord . His estranged family are currently in exile within greater Europa whereabouts unknown.

Saturday, August 18, 2007

Interview at the Department of Natural Philosophy

His credentials presented, Dr. von Traun was welcomed into the building, and greeted in the narrow antechamber before the lecture hall and laboratories. The smell of brimstone and sweet vitriol permeated the air, and Dr. von Traun helped himself to a small pinch of snuff, followed with an explosive sneeze. Wiping his reddening eyes with his handkerchief, Dr. von Traun had just finished composing himself when the doorman returned with a tall, florid man with a penetrating gaze entered from a laboratory.

"Dr. von Traun, plasurre. Pleasealloometae in'rroduce mesel'; Dr. William Cullen, Professoro'Na'ural Philosophy, herra' Aydinburr. Menzies tellsusya'renquirraun af'er Professor Black, faerhaunerswiabit, bu'?"

Dr. von Traun could only stare open-mouthed in reply.

"Sehr sorrich. I am understand that the English would be gesprechen by the Schottisch at der Universität. Possiamus linguam Latinam aut Gallicam loqui?"

"I have always found the French more fluid for these sorts conversations," replied the Scotsman in a court-accented French. "Unhappily, I'm afraid that Professor Black has relocated to Glasgow since last term, after Prof. Plummer's death last year. However, we at Edinburgh are honoured of course to host academic guests from the Continent. The Select Society, an association of philosophical gentlemen meets weekly here to discuss matters of natural and moral philosophy, and I would be honoured to present you as my guest at our meeting tonight."

Pyromaniacs at Work ???


Reports of numerous wood and brush fires have been reported near the town of Tippelbruder -- home base of the famous uniform provider.

Suspiciously, all such fires (reports vary as to whether there are six or seven fires) seem to have been started on the windward side of the town. Many are suspicious that an agent or agents of the Kingdom of Stagonia are responsible for these fires.

Numerous threats have recently been made by Koenig Maurice the Vile because of Tipplebruder's continued refusal to produce French-style uniforms. Several honorable countries have sent contingents of troops to Tipplebruder to protect them in the event of attack.

At least two of the fires are devastating crops that will be needed for the harsh winter season. It seems obvious to many Tipplebrudans that these fires were set. "Vhere vas deese foreign soldiers when deese fires vas set?" asked one Tippelbrudan.

Where indeed?

Friday, August 17, 2007

Situation In Germania: 17 August 1757 (2007)

Scene: Intendant Bastille's Office, Gallian Magazine and Citadel, Frankfurt Am Main
Date: 17 August 1757 (2007)
Narrator: Outside the familiar window overlooking the parade and now completed new jail, Bastille hears the clip clops of a rider come near and then stop below. A dispatch rider has arrived with news. Boots resound on the steps, stop, voices are heard outside the closed door followed by knocks.

Guard: Excuse me M. l' Intendant Bastille, but a dispatch rider, a very high officer, has arrived from Lt. General Chevert begging an audience this instant, if you please. [Bastille nods as a dusty eye patched Lt. Colonel of the Royal des Carabiniers enters. He is none other than....]

Lt. Col. Enigma: "Ah, mon ami. I arrive with vexing news."

Bastille: "Well, before that, please sit and refresh yourself with some cool wine and Germanian partridge. Allow me to pour you some Chevert. All is from Gallia to soothe the palate and digestion."

Enigma: "Oui, there is nothing better. I desire that above all things." [Minutes pass in small talk and companionable eating eventually followed by.]

Bastille: "I believe I may know your news but will not steal your thunder. I take it something is amiss?"

Enigma: "The Kings Army suffered a dreadful rebuff at Salzungen at the hands of Der Erbprinz of Hesse-Seewald. Though things looked very good especially on our right where my Carabiniers dashed into the enemy rear causing mayhem and destruction everywhere, we were eventually repulsed and scattered. Had we but had one more regiment! Well. The rest of the army was defeated in detail. I never saw such a thing. I escaped near a farm and only a day later found myself at the General's headquarters."

Bastille: "I heard rumors somewhat to that effect. What is next, pray tell?"

Enigma: "Lt. General Chevert has returned south to the fortress of Gemünden from whence he marched to engage Der Erbprinz. There he is recovering and restoring the Army and forming a line of battle with his flank resting on the fortress. It is his intention unless ordered to the contrary to offer one more battle there should Der Erbprinz follow up his victory. We do not yet know if he is coming south. Perhaps not with the situation at Minden looming."

Bastille: "Good. This will protect the right flank of Frankfurt Am Main. Meanwhile to the northwest Marshall de Broglie followed up his June victory at Gütersloh and is now fencing with the Britannians commanded by the Marquis of Granby who holds Minden. Now may I offer some cake and another glass?"

Narrator: Thus dear reader, we find Gallian Lt. Gen. Chevert returned to Fortress Gemünden and Marshall de Broglie near Minden. What will happen next? Will Der Erbprinz march south from Salzungen to Gemünden to engage Chevert? Will he march to aid Granby at Minden leaving behind a corps of obervation to watch Chevert? Will de Broglie strike Granby sooner or later? Or will something else occur? Time and circumstance will reveal all. Oh and Bastille is now considering filling the new jail, named after himself, with certain vexing elements in and about the city. Well, that's what he built it for, didn't he? Adieu.

Thursday, August 16, 2007

London calling..

Having been forgiven by His Britannic Majesty for his recent Jacobite "misunderstanding" Duke Karl Frederick is feted in London. The Duke had the Court presented to him prior to a Banquet in his honour.

The following day the Duke took passage upon a Tradgardland galley and is expected in the Duchy any day soon. It is reported that His Britannic Majesty was most taken with the gift of pickled Herring promised to him.

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

The Prisoner...

Finally the mob get the better of the situation. The gate is fired, the crowd stream into the building . After an age the Jesuits and fellow travellers are brought out and marched through the crowd and cast into a secured room nearby. The Abbot of St George appeals for the mob to dismiss - they do so eventually and reluctantly!
Afterwards the Abbot unlocks the door and goes into the Jesuits. He offers them safe passage NOW or their safety cannot be guaranteed...

Gymnasium under Siege

As the minutes turn to hours, the angry crowd continues its siege of the Jesuit Gymnasium in Togarastadt, keeping its boarders, faculty, staff and papal legate guests on sleepless watch into the night...

Tuesday, August 14, 2007


For posting this here, but I am in a quandry and know the answer will be had from this source :-)

I am using Jeffs templates for flags and have successfully scaled them and printed off an A4 page of them, only to realise that the Hosen sheep was facing backwards instead of forwards.

So, like a fool I deleted the file and ripped up the printed sheet. Now I can't remember how I got them to be 35mm square when printed out. I saw on somebody's blog and I was sure it was Jeffs, how to make them 25mm square by making them a certain number of pixels and I added some more pixels and got a flag the right size. However, after checking Jeffs blog for all flag postings and reading the comments too, I still can't find what I am looking for.

When I set my image editing programme to centimetres and put image size as 3.5 cm high and 7.2 cm wide it changes it automatically to 7200 x 3500 and I haven't got a clue what to do. Can anyone help me please?



Mob Rule?

The streets of the Banat are filled with a mob. The recent unsettled times have left the populous like a powder keg with ignition immanent! With torches lighting up the night sky they come in twos and threes ,swelling the crowd to hundreds.

They are seeking the recent clerical arrival in the Banat . The crowd approaches where they are believed to be in residence. Shouting fills the streets.....

Arriving in Edinburgh

Freed at last from the heaving confines of the Hebridean fishing ketch on which he and his party found transport from the Shetlands to the mainland, Dr. von Traun settled with some hesitation into the hackney carriage secured by his manservant from the waterfront public house at Leith.

The carriage rattled south through the soft mist along the uneven Leith Walk to Edinburgh to the south. Skirting to the right around Calton Hill, the carriage rolled through the narrow valleys of the city's skyscraping tenements--10 and 12 stories high, some of them, but still not tall enough to completely block out Edinburgh Castle towering grey over all against the slate-coloured heavens beyond. Continuing on the carriage bounced along the cobbled streets, crossing High Street into the Southside district in which many of the university buildings were located.

Lurching to a halt before a modest grey building undistinguished but for a brass plate beside the front door engraved "Natural Philosophy," the carriage driver called out, "Teviot Place; Toun's College." Dr. von Traun's manservant stepped out first and proceeded to the doorman, to whom he presented his master's calling card:

"Dr. Werner von Traun
Technical Counselor to His Grace Ignaz von Pfalz-Kognat-Obersayn

Monday, August 13, 2007

On the Border....

Debate still rages in the Austrian Headquarters as how best to proceed in the Banat. Opinions are divided betwixt moderation and Fire and Sword.
The Field Officer commanding the force is concerned about the meddling of the Jesuits in matters pertaining to Imperial Administration and the Military. He feels that bureaucracy is being sacrificed by the agents of party interest. Calling for his courier he sends a dispatch rider over to seek out the clerics concerned and asks them to send one of their number to the camp on the border.

The Tradgardland Broadsheet

Residents of Tradgardland watched in utter amazement as John Lethbridge of Devon, England dived beneath the waves to find the sunken steam propulsion ship.

After a perilous amount of time he emerged from the surface of the water like King Neptune himself.

It is reported that he was successful in locating the submerged vessel with a view to its recovery at a later date. All who witnessed the events marvelled at the wonders of Natural Philosophy and members of The Ducal Society heartily congratulated Mr Lethbridge. With him ,and his loyal assistants , they adjourned to the Society Rooms for a time of convivial celebration.

Papal Legates Arrive in Togarastadt

Three weary priests, accompanied by their porters and guides, trudge across the Old Borant Bridge to the main gates of the city of Togarastadt. Neither expecting or receiving any ceremony, they make their way through the unsettled streets of Togarastadt towards the cathedral towering over the town's main square.

Pausing a moment to sort through their baggage, the youngest of the three priests retrieves a document case and ascends the steps to the main door of the cathedral accompanied by a manservant carrying a hammer. Arriving at the door, the priest opens the document case and carefully unrolls an oversized sheet of parchment on which a document of some length has been printed. Exchanging the document case for the hammer with his manservant, the priest surveys the door critically a moment and then hammers the document to the door just above eye level. Walking back down the steps, he acknowledges the small crowd attracted by his hammering, offering them a small blessing and informing them that a fuller explanation will be forthcoming after Vespers.

The gathering crowd begins to gravitate towards the notice on the door, which is headlined in an elaborate German fraktur "Edict of Grace"...

Nyhavn Tradgardland

This morning the remains of the recent fleet limped their way into Nyhavn this morning. Accounts given suggest that only a very few ships have survived. Of notable mention is the steam propulsion vessel which sunk within 100 yards of the shore.
Whilst rumours abound to the contrary, neither the Duke or the Prince have been accounted for. It is believed that some remnants of the fragmented fleet may have taken refuge elsewhere. The coming days will provide further information...

Sunday, August 12, 2007

Scottish Coastal Sightings..........

Villagers off the Northern coast of Scotland last night saw a fleet in great difficulties. A number of vessels were sunk and wreckage thrown upon the beach. No further information is available at this time.

Queries from the Monte-Cristan College of Heraldry

To their highly Esteemed Colleagues of other Countries.
It is a widely known fact that, among other pet projects, our Prince-President wishes to build a complete collection of full-color paintings depicting the uniform, trumpeter or drummer livery and flags of all military bodies of our Europe and its (ex) colonies. The equivalent of the famous French artist Mouillard plates, with the addition of the musicians’livery, and extended to our whole Continent.

Some twenty young and adventurous artists are currently selected by our renowned uniformologist and painter FL Funcken, executive coordinator of this Encyclopedia. They shall be sent to travel up and down Europe (some will go oversea) to directly record the exact details and colors required by this Presipapal project.

Presently our information is often limited, almost non-existent for such countries as Bratzenborsch, Byzantium, Colonia Julia Equestris, Leder-Hosen, Noverre, Saxe-Murnau, Saxe-Nweilintz, Scandalusia y Cuatrofenia, Skavenberg, Togaras, Vulgaria….

A project of such gigantic proportion can obviously not be carried to a successful conclusion by a single person or country. Without the cooperation of similarly minded Artists and Rulers its failure is ineluctable.

Thus His Proeminency honored the College of Heraldry (a Branch of the Historical Department of the Monte-Cristan Academy of Sciences) with the mission to get in touch with our Esteemed Colleagues of other Countries, and ask for their knowledgeable brotherly assistance. We must confess take we dared to extend our mission to our normal field of research: heraldry, and the related fields of vexillology and the science of liveries. Actually it was on our suggestion that our Well-Loved Ruler added the musicians’ livery to his project –at least the ‘State’ livery worn by the trumpeters or drummers of Honored Regiments.

On this later point, with the exception of Britannia and Gallia, our ignorance is practically total.

We ackowledge in advance with the utter gratitude the effort of those of our Esteemed Colleagues of other Countries who would share with us any pertinent information not yet publicly available. This messge was also posted on the Monte-Cristan official board: please send your information there or, better, make it public on the official board of your own Country.
Dieudonne E. Tronssec, ex-Maire de Freche, Permanent Secretary of the College of Heraldry of Monte-Cristo

Saturday, August 11, 2007

A letter that has been printed and distributed to Europa

My People of the Banat
Greeting from your Voivde! I Address you from the Abbey of St George. I thank you for your loyalty in times past, if not present !
I leave you in the care and concern of the Empress to whom your loyalty must now lie. I leave you in her Majesty's benevolent power for posterity. You will once more take your place as her loyal subjects.
As for me I seek Holy Orders here and my family have gone into exile across Europa to a safe place.
I wish to atone for my sins and for those of the Bant. Remember me in yours prayers as I will remember you all.
Voivde of the Banat of Togoras

A cultural Event in Monte-Cristo

Louys, President-elected Prince of Monte-Cristo, will open next Sunday at 11 a.m. an exceptional Exposition in the Great Hall of the Museum of Arts and Sciences, themed «Oriental Arts». Will be on display a full series of colored Indian paintings illustrating the entire Kama-Sutra, while a remarkable collection of Japanese etchings dealing with similar themes viewed from at different culture will provide an instructive comparison. Parental advisory warning to foreigners. The Presipality will give a dancing aperitive drink to conclude the inauguration.

Friday, August 10, 2007

More Missing Folks

Last Month, the young Frankszonian colonel, Hielgekeine v. Brattman, had been dispatched with a convoy of Larger, Wine, and beer franks to one of our cousin countries .... (alas, I can't find the note which says which one).
This mission had begun prior to the exposure of the infamous profiteering with adulterated products by Dilbert. Messengers had spurred after the Oberst Hielgekeine not only to warn him about the potential hazards ground into his wagons, but also to prevent his subversion by Cut - me - own - Throat Dilbert, who is known to be a very effective salesman.
Somewhere in the hill country of Northwestern Bohemia, these messengers have discovered wounded teamsters from the wagons and some scattered Hussars. They report being ambushed by either Germanian Bosniaks or Imperial Croats or some similar group of Balkan Bandits.
The young Oberst had rashly ridden into a clump of the foe and been overwhelmed. It is thought that he has also suffered a head wound, but since he was removed, supposedly to be held for ransom, the extent and nature of his injuries is unknown. Further, since there has been no ransom note received, the Frankszonian court is even more concerned that this is further result of either vile Stagonian plots or further sabotage by the Cheese Burger faction.
A reward of a fine charcoal brazier and grill with a good supply of certified, high quality brats is promised for information and / or assistance in the rescue of Hielgekeine alive!

Count l'Beauphaup
on behalf of the Hurtshog Fahrtz v. Frankszonia

Thursday, August 9, 2007

Masquerade Program

Schedule of Events for the Formal Presentation of the Urpprinz Honker v. Frankszonia

9 AM: Processional March to the Cathedral
10 AM: Christening Mass for the Urpprinz
11 AM: Recessional Progress to the Palace
12 AM: Congress of Knights (gathering of military leaders from the area, formal luncheon)
2 PM: “Election” of the Urpprinz (simple matter, only one candidate, only family and military officers accredited to the Court voting)
3 PM: Reception of Dignitaries and Representative of Foreign Princes (Orchestral background music composed by Moosart)
5 PM: State Dinner for the above and the Stadt Council (music and dancing)
9 PM: Performance of Moosart’s “Sommeren Nacht” (Opera based on Mid Summer’s Night)

10 AM: Progress from Palace to the Stadt Hoff
11 AM: Installation of new Stadt Councilors from Nidda and Griswald
12 AM: Formal Recognition of the UrpPrinz by the Stadt Council
1 PM: Presentation of the UrpPrinz to the Volkmutterung
1:15 PM: Tapping of Kegs at every corner
6 PM: Order restored on major streets for passage of carriages to the Masquerade
7 PM: Gates of Masquerade Hall opened, Sage Guard in full strength attendance.
(Gallian forces will also be posted discretely on the grounds)
8 PM: Dancing begins and the grand Heraldic presentations to the participants.
9 PM: Formal entrance of Oberon and Titania (Is Titania the Lady Masquerade or the Lady Pettygree? Who is chosen for Oberon? The Hurtshog and Princess Stuftliana are attending as one of the lover pairs ... Who has to wear the donkey’s head?
12 PM: Fireworks

Noon: Inspections by Court Physicians
2 PM: Processional March to Cathedral
3 PM: High Mass, Blessing of Banners,
4 PM: Recessional March to Palace
5 PM: Another grand feast ... which must include many, many ceremonial toasts ....

Monday: Recuperation, recovery, and reconstruction.

Wednesday, August 8, 2007

Abbey to Tavern

Lew Wzgórzowo, Główny m adiutant Pułkownik Koronowski departs the abbey lands after the morning services, takes his time moving about the town, twice.

Carefully watching for others whom may be regarding him.

Główny Wzgórzowo then makes his way towards the docks, and nearby the tavern re-connects with the troop of dragoons in civilian clothing, dispatching one to the quay where their ship is docked, in order to relay the contact has begun.

The other dragoons continue with their preparations in the area around the Tavern, should anything go awry in the coming evening meeting, not expecting to meet the Vovide any more, as he has clearly been 'sanctified' within the abbey, it is with some members of the court that shall have to be dealt with, their connections and intentions are less obvious.

Who will rally with the Grand Duke beneath the banners of Stollen?

The missing Princess Valerie of Pillau-Zerbst, who eloped with the recently deceased Prince Ruprecht last year, together with the dastardly French mercenary General Phillip de Latté, has surfaced in the court of Zichenau! Moreover, she has been sighted on the arm of de Latté, who has been found to be in the service of Ruprecht’s mother Princess Antonia of Tauroggen-Fiebus! Princess Antonia assumed the throne of Zichenau last month when her son Ruprecht expired suddenly, following his return from exile in the American colonies.

While we cannot be entirely certain, it would appear that Princess Valerie and Princess Antonia have been consorting with General de Latté all along -- enmeshed within a bizarre and confusing love triangle that has hatched an elaborate scheme to lure Stollen into war on several fronts with the aim of occupying the Grand Duchy and recovering the historically disputed province of Schleiz, which sits between Stollen and the Electorate of Zichenau.

Their plan, according to our reliable sources inside Zichenau, is to, “Boil that half-witted lobster in his own juices and serve him to the King of Prussia garnished with parsley on a platter!”
It would appear that Stollen’s Grand Duke Irwin-Amadeus might find himself at war on at least two fronts by the summer’s end in a few weeks.

Accordingly, the Grand Duke has spent the morning in deep consultation with his closest ministers and advisors. Their aim? To form their own coalition, to counter the efforts of Princess Antonia and her toadies should the need arise. Who among the states of apocryphal 18th century Europe will answer the call?

On a related note, Irwin-Amadeus II appeared rather unexpectedly before the session, dressed in an unmistakably dark blue, full-skirted general’s coat, complete with orders and decorations across the chest. Might the Grand Duke’s apparent feeble mindedness have been an elaborate ruse? Time will indeed tell. Perhaps action on the field of Mars will demonstrate the Grand Duke's grasp on reality. . .

Leder-Hosen sends greetings to all existing Imagi-Nations

Gentlemen (and ladies) the Kingdom of Leder-Hosen has arisen from the ashes of my last failed effort and is now ready to take her place in fictional 18th Century Europe alongside you all.

I have got off to a better start this time, having thought things through a little more than I did last time, with the headlong rush to start blogging before I was really ready. You can find His Majesty the King at



Monday, August 6, 2007

Discussing the Vile...

A private library, somewhere in Hesse-Engelburg....

A man in a Major's uniform studies a wall map, before stepping to pull a bell-cord. A few minutes later, a slightly aged but still strong butler enters to attend him. "You rang, Herr Major?"

"Yes, Karl...has there been any further word from Mutter Anna?"

The butler seems to have expected the question, shaking his head with an appropriately apologetic expression. "I am afraid not, Herr Major. The latest post just arrived, and there was nothing."

Pursed lips greet the news, before the Major turns back from the map to face the attendant. "I did not think there would be. I fear Mutter Anna is holding out on us, Karl...she has sent us nothing of importance from Stagonia these several months, and now she cannot find even one merchant. We financed her house with the expectation of useful information from her patrons, and I do not think it is the girls who are failing to deliver....I fear Mutter Anna is lining her pockets without holding up her end of the bargain."

"The dearth is....conspicuous, Herr Major," agrees the butler quietly, nodding a couple of times before he inquires, "Have you any instructions for the next post, Herr Major?"

"Yes, Karl...I feel that Mutter Anna is going to have a tragic accident....most unfortunate, but clearly only an accident." He pauses, moving to his desk and opening a book, looking down a list of records in a curious shorthand, before looking up to the waiting servant again, "I think Belinda would be best to take over the position of Mutter. Would you agree, Karl?"

The servant considers, then nods decisively, "Ja, Herr was her own initiative that gave us the opportunity to free those 3 prisoners from the Baron's dungeon. I believe he *still* believes the Austrian count responsible for that one."

Another purse of lips, and then the Major nods, "You are right, Karl. It is time she saw more of the fruit of her labors. You will arrange the details?"

"Of course, Herr Major. Is there anything else, Herr Major?"

"No, Karl, that will be....wait, just one more thing. Tell Belinda that from now on the girls' cut will be increased to forty percent of the fee for any useful information provided. It will smooth the transition nicely, and perhaps bring us further information. Mutter Anna was only giving them ten percent. That suffices...see that it is discrete."

"Ja, Herr Major. It shall be done." A bow, and the butler retires, leaving the officer to his thoughts.

A reply to a recent letter..

Fraternal greetings to you. We are delighted to make room for your representative on the Fleet which leaves any day now for Shetland from Smegby. We look forward to him presenting himself directly with us. I will introduce him to the Prince ,if he is not indisposed as he is often these days, if you glean my meaning. I am most intrigued as to the business to be undertaken in the Athens of the North -namely Edinburgh .
Karl Frederick
Duke of Tradgardland

Letter to His Grace the Duke of Tradgardland

To our noble cousin, greetings.

In view of the brisk nautical intercourse between your realm and that of Scotland, we have authorised our Technical Counselor, Werner von Traun, the bearer of this letter, to present himself to your court for aid in booking passage for himself and his manservants from your well-favoured harbourage either directly to Edinburgh, the object of his voyage, or to such outward portions of the Scottish realm as may be practicable in the near term, from which locales the very competent Herr von Traun may be trusted to make his own way to Edinburgh.

Confident in your assistance in these matters, we make bold also to request that you also provide Herr von Traun permission to make inspection, while in Tradgardland, of your justly renowned Feuerwerkfabriken and various herring packing facilities of Tradgardstadt.

Your sincere and devoted cousin,

Herzog Ignaz von Pfalz-Kognat-Obersayn

The Abbey...II

Seeing the Vovide pass him the man nods slightly and proceeds to follow Vovide Max into the Abbey, careful to first allow a few other paritioners into the chamber before him, between the Vovide and himself.

He watches for where the Vovide is leading...

Troops Headed for Defense of Tippelbruder

Since those vile Stagonians are threatening the safety of the Town of Tippelbruder (supplier of uniforms to many nations), Furst Bruno von Ursa of Saxe-Bearstein is sending over a thousand men to protect this vital supply resource.

It is our understanding that a number of other imagi-Nations have also volunteered troops. It is suggested that Tippelbruder's neighbors might well keep a close eye on this rapidly escalating situation.

Stagonia is vile, I tell you. Vile!

-- Jeff of Saxe-Bearstein

Sunday, August 5, 2007

A meeting in the abbey

Banat of Togaras;
Abbey of St George.

In the predawn light a cloaked figure awaits with others for the morning mass...his tricorned hat a dark brown felt, of a make more common east of the Oder than so far north and west as here.

He waits with other paritioners, waiting for a face to turn his way, a face to match the one on the fragment of china in his pocket. Other than this tenuous link he has nothing to connect him to the man he is seeking to meet, Vovide Max.

Friday, August 3, 2007

A private Letter circulated to all Rulers of Europa...

His Eminence Prince Charles Edward Stuart,
sends greetings to his fellow European Rulers in the name of peace and fraternity!
Along with my esteemed friend , Karl Frederick, I hereby proclaim that a Crusade is being undertaken in the name of the Trinity - True Monarchy.True Religion and True Ducal Authority!
Soon we set sail upon a great Adventure - a toe -hold for one of us and possession of their Ducal lands for another.
I write asking for your prayers, money support and fine claret.All who wish to donate may do so through the TradgardLand Guild of Fishermen , Smegby, Tradgardland.
Your Brother and True Monarch

Letter of response to Voivde Max of Banat of Togaras

To your august personage, Vovide Max; or any member of the Banat of Togaras council.

Pulkownik Koronowski of the Korona Korpus stands ready to assist you in this time of troubles.

Pulkownik Koronowski only requests a direct audience with either yourself and your council so as to determine the best actions that the Korona Korpus may provide and therefore the correct compensation for such action.

Yours respectfully,
Pulkownik Koronowski

Matters Ecclesiastical.........

To Msgr. Baldesar de ChiaroscuroLegatus Missus of the Holy FatherTutor and Confessor to the House of Pfalz-Kognat-Obersayn
Greetings in the faith to you and yours!
Much as we are grateful for your concern and interest we are unsure whether your time could not be spent otherwise and elsewhere. The Court Chaplin , who conducted the recent and irregular celebration, has been severely disciplined and sent to a chastening mission -field in the mountains.
Of the sincerity of the repentance of the Voivde be assured - it is both sincere and long lasting. We have spoken with him at length and frequently over these last days. The Chaos reigning here is chastisement enough I feel. So do not fear for him or us either- all will be well!
I look forward to hearing from you at your earliest convenience.

Archbishop of the Banat of Torgoras
Abbot of the Abbey of St George

Reply to the Open Letter to the Holy Father

To His Serene Highness, Max of the Togaras:

The Holy Father has received your appeal for reconciliation with the same good grace in which it was written, and authorises his legates, your humble correspondent unworthily made their chief, to establish communications with your court to lay the groundwork for a suitable act of faith to dispose of these charges and reconcile your principality to the Church.

The first item to be covered is a review of the ecclesiastical particulars of the Togaras. Could you please provide a brief aide-memoire of the significant personages and establishments of Holy Mother Church in your principality? Such information will be vital in determining whether a permanent establishment of the Holy Office will be advisable as part of the Act of Faith.

Upon receipt of such intelligence as you are able to provide we will begin the practical preparations for our mission to your justly renowned principality.

Your humble servant,

Msgr. Baldesar de Chiaroscuro
Legatus Missus of the Holy Father
Tutor and Confessor to the House of Pfalz-Kognat-Obersayn

(Slight Format Change)

To all Rulers,

You might note that I have moved the "Links" above everything else so that it is now at the top of the page (to your right).

If I have inadvertently left any links off, please advise me ASAP. Do check your links to make sure that they are correct. If missing or incorrect, please let me know either via the comments or email me at . . .

And now, back to the Eighteenth Century!

-- Jeff

Thursday, August 2, 2007

A letter of appeal in extremis...

Fellow Rulers of Europa!
I greet you from hiding! The Banat is falling apart - brother fights brother. I have heard no word from the Vatican or the Imperium. I am deserted. I call upon my immediate neighbours to enter the Banat of Torgoras, and by force of arms , restore order and quell this ruination.
You are the last hope of a new nation .
Max Voivde

Wednesday, August 1, 2007

To all decent peoples of Uropa

It has come to our attention that the Vile Stagonians (Vile, that's their title, right?) have been threatening Tippelbruder, source of fine uniforms for many of our nations. The Soweiter League has also been threatened by the same Villains. We have expressed our intent to defend our own sovereignty against invasion or usurpation and reiterate that intent here.
We further hereby declare our intent to support Tippelbruder with whatever aid we can provide. As we are a small and newly formed league we will likely require all forces we can muster to defend our own territory, but rest assured we will supply any wigs, musical instruments, cases of Donnybrook ale, casks of Bordelleaux wine, Saxe-Goldberg cuckoo clocks and any other support we can provide in aid of other free and decent nations threatened by the Vile Stagonians.

Our only wish is for peace and prosperity throughout Urope,
Your Humble Servant,
Zurik Fitz-Badger
Mayor of Soweiterstadt

The Grand Parade

Le Grande Parade
(Die Grosse Marche)

Detachments from:
From Right:
Frankszonian forces:
* The Cellulite Cursers, Cuirassiers 400
* Hillary's Hussies: Hussars 350
* Reiters, Cuirassiers 350
* The Porcelain Regt, dragoons 400
** Der Zeizme Bundt Guard (* IR Summer Guard,(300) * IR Grinderdiers (600), )
* IR Black Kilts (600)
* IR Phaulie’s Fusils (1200)
* 2nd bat IR Hottatrot (300)
** Nathan's Nationals
Militia infantry: The Guild Companies, the Nordfeld regiment, and the Sudfeld regt.
Militia cavalry: The Wurst Brat Dragoons.
(Note, the militia seems quite under strength, especially the Nordfeld and Sudfeld regiments. The Militia still incorporates pike companies. Some of these men even appear to be carrying matchlocks, as well).
Artillery and Engineers special units.
* The Bombed Kennedy's (600)
{The Intendant and his officers will notice that, unlike the antique artillery they found in Frankfurt, this unit is equipped with pieces of the latest design – I’ve got to use AWI pieces with my plastics, okay? – including 4 siege guns, a battery of howitzers, about a dozen 12 pounders and two dozen 6 pounders, Granny Loomis is riding in an open carriage at their head}.

Total strength of reliables present: 3,800 ...
Total forces in unreliable units present: 1,700

(Not present because currently deployed away from Frankfurt)
Along the Nidda River, etc.
* Hiese Hunde Hussies (400)
* Vinny's Vincibles (240)
* IR Braunsbienz, (600)
* IR Foot Longs, (600)
With the Corps Chevert
** Colonel Chickens Brigade (@1200)
* 1st Battalion, IR Hottatrot (@600)

Gallian Forces:
* De Saxe Uhlans: 120 guarding Pettygree and Masquerade now housed here within the Citadel.
* Militia Grenadiers: 480, in the citadel itself, the guards you saw here.
* Brigade Flanders: Three battalions: 1,952 hommes.
* Brigade Provence: Four battalions: 2,323 hommes here in Frankfurt Am Main.
* Artillerie: 8 Battalion Pieces.
* Brigade Auvergne: Two battalions: 1,200 hommes (regulars).
* Saxe-Raschstein Chevaulegers von Rutowski: 400 hommes.
* Artillerie: 1 Battalion Piece.

Total in Frankfurt: 6,475, does not count de Poyanne’s corps.

Now Just North Of The City:
L’Corps de Armée de Lt. Gen. de Poyanne is not far away. He has some 25,000 hommes and twenty pieces of ordnance.

General Nathan is among the notables on the dias with the Hurtshog and the Intendant.
He has informed Intendant Bastille that the Hurtshog considers * Hillary's Hussies: Hussars 350
* Reiters, Cuirassiers 350 and the Militia units as all unreliable against the noble / Hamburger plot ... also, the IR Foot Longs are not trusted.. Also, IR Foot Longs, to the west of town are considered to have too many officers related to the plotting nobles. The Duke intends to order all of these to the south to Offenbach in the expedition “to protect Offenbach.” He will send Vinny’s Vincibles with them, and Once they know their orders are specifically to Offenbach and against Stagonia, however, there will be sentiment among the troops to stand steady on that assignment. This, however, will entail a dangerous passage of potentially hostile troops through Frankfurt. The Duke hopes that sufficient Gallian “guides” will be assigned to these forces to prevent any unpleasantness.

During the speech segment of the review, the Hurtshog denounces the vile plotting of the Hamburgers and Stagonians to despoil Frankfurt and her friends, the Soweiter League. He reads, with suitably acidic commentary, the note given to the Soweiter League. Reliable men posted throughout the unit give the appropriate shouts of anger and resolution and cheer when the Hurtshog declaims: “We shall stand steadfast against these threats and preserve the ancient privileges and autonomy of Frankfurt!”

Then he proclaims the Divine Providence of the presence of Gallian forces between Frankfurt and the Hamburger contagion. “Given that the main effort of resisting this subtle, underhanded sneak attack will fall upon them, we are elevating the Gallian Intendent to Lt. General of Frankszonia so that he and his staff can most efficiently direct our defense in this crisis!”
There is a smattering of extremely polite applause to this, as a strange conveyance is wheeled onto the field. It is a fancifully carved and painted large wooden rocking horse! Gen. Nathan whispers that the rockers conceal an ingenious suspension to provide a comfortable ride. Obviously the rider would sit head and shoulders above even the escorting team of cuirassiers! The Hurtshog continues, “As is traditional, we hereby install the General Bastille upon his mount of command!” As cheerful Frankszonian officers urge the General up onto the contrivance (there is also an ingenious little ladder to enable one to mount it), the Frankzonian forces are led in the ceremonial three “Huzzahs!” A section of the Summer Sage Guards forms up in rigid attention, and after presenting arms, assumes a position to protect the Intendant.

Then General Hottatrot and Oberst Rosenschnauz are brought forward.
The Marquis Hottatrot, leaning on two grenadiers, is awarded the Order of the Grilled Wiener for his initiative and bravery at the Battle of Bad Tannes ... his persistance even when seriously wounded is also mentioned. Then the color party of the 2nd Battalion of IR Hottatrot is ordered forward as representative of the regiment and presented with a red ribbon for the Battle of Bad Tannes.
The rotund Oberst Rosenschnauz is formally promoted to Brigadier in recognition of his steadfastness when literally between enemy fires, again in spite of his wounds, leading his battalion in holding its ground until the Cellulite Cursers and the Black Skirts could deploy and force the foe to fold.
As the infantry regiment Chicken is in the field with Gen. Chevert, Hauptman Sanders is given the red ribbon for the Battle of Bad Tannes for their unit.
After further huzzahs, and a speech by General Bastille, the parade proceeds to its conclusion ....