"Attention nations - manhunt! Der Direktorat aus Herrschaden has uncovered absolute physical and testimonial evidence, concerning the actions by The Ecclesiarchs, of the Order of The Bloodied Martyr, in the Lifonlian war of Succession. We also warn all nations, that these despicable and fanatic beings are also operating covertly in several other nations. As a result of this information, Der Direktorat aus Herrschaden has invoked Article 37, paragraph 19, point (f), which clearly states, in part:
....all such proscribed persons are to be identified, such identity publicly displayed, hunted and exterminated....
HAVE YOU SEEN THIS MAN?
Due to the advanced technological and scientific programs conducted within Herrschaden, we can identify this insidious individual. He is none other than the Exiled Tyrant of Huypece, Ricardo Au gout Apre!
Now in Ordo service, in Langdouc.
We provide an absolute exact statementrelating to this mans activities in the Lifonlian Civil War and warn all nations, he is on the move again - we believe at this time, he may also be responsible for several disturbances on, near or within the borders, of The Schwabian Leauge.
This warning has been korrektly authorized with Code ID: OIIIIIIIO
6 comments:
We in Monte-Cristo heard with horrified sadness of the hideous crimes recently perpetrated by the Ordo of The Bloodied Martyrs in Lifonlia.
How distressing that, in our Age of Enlightenment and Reason, blind, crazy fanaticism can still drive such atrocious behaviors!
One wonders if an exceptional mold of centuries-old fantastical fears and terrified superstitions, peculiar to the area, contributes to the local madness? For sure impaling is traditional there, combined by the Order with Ancient Roman crucifixion in the most eclectic way.
These atrocities came as a shock, but not a total surprise. While for some reason the Monte-Cristan 'Service' is dismally less efficient there than usually, the Presipapal Palace learned enough about the 'Chiesarchia' of the 'Order' to worry and inquire for more.
As a matter of fact our agents and informants, with the invaluable help of the Gypsies, are already tracking that Ricardo Au gout Apre.
We are also wondering if the actions of the Ordia are coordinated -directly or by the Vatican through the Opus Dei- with those of other militant sects we are secretly confronting? But indeed what evidence is already available hints for the Langdoucian Order at far more fearsome, wide-ranged objectives verging on the heretical.
UD Walther Ansbach-Hoffen received a folder (a huge trunk, actually) of copies of all the relevant files in the Presipapal secret archives.
Another source of worry is the simultaneity between this surge of crazy zealot unrest -after centuries of seclusion, for the Successor Crusading Ordia- and the disturbing reports of weird events from different Continents. Could it be that, according to some esoteric calendar (Maya perhaps, but scholars here favor the R'lyeh one), feverish devouts of opposite convictions believe we are reaching the Millenium? A few may even think as their Sacred Duty to trigger the Final Battle...
But .. but .. but .. that appears to be the physical duplicate of our proud brigadier Ruprecht of Hanau! Surely there must be a mistake!
An 'Evil Twin' perhaps, if not a Doppleganger....
We suggest to Ruprecht of Hanau to be secretely tattooed on a private part ofhis anatomy, so that if he suddenly appears to be gifted with ubiquity, you'll know what one is to be shot down.
I'm not sure I'm prepared to go around inspecting the private parts of my brigadiers, to be honest! Perhaps just shoot them all and round up a new batch, that seemed to work for Robespierre, Danton, and Barras ...
The cultural influence of the Direktorat is obviously spreading.
Shooting them all and rounding up new ones certainly works in many instances...however,
...perhaps Ruprecht aus Hanau could make his presence and whereabouts known at the time of these (very sloppy) Ordo extremes?
SLOPPINESS!!!! They didn't even have the sense to measure the length and height of the impalement posts and crucifix uprights! AND failed to ensure all the cross pieces were of korrekt and identical dimension! The victims were not even korrektly spaced, just 'randomly' strung up and about - those people are a menace to science! Whoever ordered and overseered the debacle should be shot under Article 13, paragraph 45, point (l), which clearly states (in part):
...sloppiness, mess and tardiness and the like, are an indication of "Lack of Attention to detail"...
a Kapital offence, or, on the jurisdiction of a Direktor, sentence for 20 years minimum to the Liebregt...
...we rest our case...
Authorized Code ID: OIIIIIIIO
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