Friday, December 14, 2007

l'Prince de Charade and the Frankzonians, cont.

I was going to post this as a comment, but alas, it would have been buried.

The Margravaine Rhabbidiers, in her exquisite gown and lace, tends to speak lowly and quietly to an "interpreter." While her French is actually quite fluent, her voice is quite ... ah ... non-diplomatic, so speaking quietly behind her fan, the Prince is not subjected to the normal screeching drill effect of her conversation.
Besides, it gives her an excuse to enjoy the wine she first tasted in the General's tent last year ... in rather late affair of state ...

"Your Highness, I must warn you first that this is an official "Note of Protest." It's a necessary maneuver, as I am glad to explain.
We've communicated several times in the past for the need for some sort of formal accord between Frankszonia and Gallia, and now the situation has reached a crisis point.
"Please understand, our court would be horrified if Gallia actually followed the requirements of this protest. Most of our army, including the foreigners, are afield against Stagonia. Our Duke is ill and his heir is but an unweaned piglet. There remain at least two strong factions which would love to include the Ducal family in their sausage recipes, not to mention the many enemies we've made for ourselves while struggling on Gallia's behalf. The simple solution, for which Frankszonia earnestly hopes, is the creation of a formal accord between the Gallian monarch and its representatives and the Hurtshog and his representatives.
"Now, if you'll permit my strong voiced friend here his unpleasant duty."

From: The Hurtshog Stanken Fahrtz von Frankfurter
To: His Sublime Majesty, King Louis XV, monarch of Gallia.

My dear cousin,
Sad necessity requires that we protest most vigorously against the illegal presence of Gallian forces in Frankszonian territory.
Your precipitous invasion of our admittedly small land was previously unopposed as at that time you were in alliance with her Supreme August, the Empress. Unfortunately, however, the Imperium and Hesse-Seewald / Gemania appear to have arrived at some sort of accommodation.
As a loyal component of the Upper Frankonian Kreis, we also, in the absence of any other authorizing conjunctions, must therefore withdraw from the forces opposed to the Germanian aggressions.
This creates a series of unpleasant complications:
First of all, the Bastille which now stands just outside our walls must be given over to Frankszonian forces and the prisoners within, whose incarceration was necessitated by the conflict, be released

(The Margravaine giggles ... and whispers, "Certament! With nothing but a palace guard and children to hold it and to face all those virulent foes of the Hurtshog! Even the Intendent Bastille the sour face must laugh at this!")

Secondarily, the magazine and arsenal assembled by Gallia within Frankfurt must be evacuated and Gallian forces remove themselves from the city and its environ.

(The baron himself, winces at this, "that will leave us a nice raw casing for somebody to stuff, no?")

Thirdly, as ;'Intendant Bastille has shown himself an industrious and patriotic Gallian commander, we will not act upon these demands until adequate communication between our courts has occurred, however, these demand will be posted soon within the city and copies of this note provided to the Imperial court..

(the Margravaine: "Those Wienies!)

Interim, the Hurtshog sincerely hopes that the admirable offices of the brilliant Gallian ministers will provide a suitable solution for our contretemps.

Regretfully,
Your Cousin, the Hurtshog Stanken

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