Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Offenback Falls!

Alas, it seems that the vacillations of the local Offenbach leaders has left them victims to Stagonian duplicity. The tiny, brave brigade; which Frankszonia had so generously sent to their aid in response to the earlier Stagonian Ultimatum was driven back.
We gather together again.
We call upon all the friends of the Soweiter League to assemble against the Vile Stagonian invasions.
Offenbach shall be free again!

Perhaps, it is only natural in the disorder naturally accompanying Stagonian rule, that the battalions celebrating near the Tuba Works on Wine, Bratwurst, and other condiments supplied by Offenbach merchants should accidentally set the works on fire. Surely, the stories of brats exploding with white fire and other tales are apocryphal events derived from the inebriated state of the participants in the barbeque ...
When Offenbach is liberated, the Freedom Alliance will surely restore the works and improve upon them ....

--- Note to the Intendant Bastille ___
Sire, Given the recent intelligence of the dear victory obtain by the Marshal Broglie, the absence of immediate threat to Gen. Chevert, and the unfortunate debacle in Offenbach, it is necessary to recall all Frankszonian forces to urgently concentrate to defend our integral territories.
We have unconfirmed intelligence, however, that some understanding exists between Gallia and Vile Stagonia. If so, obviously your valiant and skilled men can not assist us in this affair. As proven friends, however, the Hurtshog and his court wish to advise you to be wary of Vile Stagonia, which is well known not only for its perversions, but also its perfidies ....
Sincerely, l' Beauphaup ...

from Arthur:
It's been an hilarious romp ... I haven't been able to catch up my own blog on it even! I hear everybody had fun, though one person had to drive home in an horrible storm (been there, glad he made it ok!).
All right, who's next?


Stagonian Jeff said...

Offenbach did not fall!

Indeed, since we of Stagonia were not interested in the Tuba Works to start with -- that was well documented to be the fallacious Frankzonian goal.

No, after driving off the Frankzonian invader, the only members of our army to even approach the area of the Tuba Works were those officers invited in to celebrate the victory over Frankzonia which leaves Offenbach firmly in its own hands.

If the Frankzonians had managed to sell any of those famous exploding sausages to the Offenbach army, it is certainly not the fault of our brave Stagonian troops.

We left all of Offenbach safely in Offenbach hands (unlike the Frankzonian desire to annex Offenbach and force their men into the Frankzonian army).

We of Stagonia are on our way to help yet another poor people victimized by "helpful" neighbors.

-- Jeff of Stagonia

MurdocK said...

Fantastic to see the 'different' views of the two sides of the Offenbach conflict, and their 'interpretations' of the events of October 21, 1757.